Saturday, March 15, 2008

How I got from Cat Stevens to paranoia at 5 in the morning? I was whacked out on Rollaids!

I was ruthlessly sick. I mean heartburn so bad I was afraid to spit because it might break through the earths crust and do some damage to the core. I tried to fight it, but I hurled. Painfully, I might add. All to the betterment of my stomach. The bile dragon was evil, so hot and horrible I swear I heard my teeth enamel crack. I know I whimpered a lot after gagging it all up. So after brushing my teeth a few times and cleaning up after myself, I wanted nothing more than to go back to bed. Shivering and miserable, I crawl back under the covers and try to warm up. The leftover warmth in there helped a little. I try to get my brain back into sleep mode. *WOOOO-SAAAAA* Relax, shut down. I ran through my internal soundtrack because it was annoyingly set to Jack Johnson. Who I actually like, but he was driving me crazy playing the same refrain over and over inside my head. So I scroll through some easy listening favorites to calm down/fall asleep with... James Taylor, no, struck me as to annoying as well. I've overplayed you got a friend. Tommy Dorsey? How did he get in this section? Jeeze. Carly Simon? eh. Then mocking bird came on. nooo,no... tooooo up, I want peace, I want shhhhhness. Carol King, off Tapestry? No... hmmm. Cat Stevens. Well, alright then. Let's listen. So I'm playing "Oh Very Young" in my head. Singing along. Then my brain kicked in with the thinking crap and memories. Jesus Tap dancing Christ, mayIbestruckbyightninglordfortakingyournameinvainamen. Cat Stevens. Whom I LOVED as a baby. I sang along to his songs with my Daddy as a little girl(and my lovely multi-tasking little brain got nostalgic and weepy over my dad for a minute before it kicked back to the paranoia thought. and OMG, pls don't let me be crazy like my DAD!), as a teen I got some of his albums, still love him as an adult. Then ~SCREEEEEECH~ Wait a minute? Who the fuck is Yusuf Islam? And am I going to be on a terrorist watch list because I googled him (10 years ago) and went to his website???? He's not even let into this country still. I think still? *SIGH* Paranoia. Jumping from thought to thought, which I won't even BEGIN to explain the process of. (back then...) Jeeze, should I venture into the land of free information? Am I going to be in trouble for googling him up now? Put on some government watch list because I have a penchant for a 70's easy listening rocker who converted to Islam before I was even 7 years old? You may laugh, but these thoughts were on my mind. Back then and even right now. It wasn't long after that I saw on the news the Taliban was destroying the priceless Buddhist figures, those massive statues. My heart was breaking seeing such beauty destroyed, because if you are a student of ancient and medieval history, you know what that means. You know what's next. When some faction takes over and starts destroying a peoples cultural heritage, the shit is going to hit the fan-but soon. And you know what? A couple Septembers later it did. So all this terrorist shit, and the Islamic religion, lordforgivemeforusingbothinthesamesentence. *I have nothing but respect for others religion.* So all this stuff made me paranoid. LMAO! How much of a sheep did it make me feel like? BE AFRAID! Yeah? BAAAAAA! Screw that. My innocence is still intact. I love Cat Stevens music. If it's going to soothe me to sleep, then so be it. I'll be damned if I'll let the ass-hats and bureaucrats of the world make me paranoid and afraid to look. Now get OUT of my head so I can listen to some Teaser and the Firecat and go BACK to SLEEP! Btw, here is a Wikipedia link for Cat Stevens: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cat_Stevens I am very aware none of this makes sense to anyone but me, but I feel better for sitting up and blogging it. Now that I spit it out, maybe I can clear that space and plant a nice soothing and happy little Bob Ross landscape there. Hey, it's MY head! *QUIET IN THE 8 TRACK BOOTH!* "Ohhh very young what do you leave us thisss timeeee, you're only dancing on this world for a short while, and though your dreams may toss and turn you now, they will vanish away like your dads best jeans, denim blue, faded up to the sky." Sigh, sitting under my happy little Bob Ross tree and listening to Cat Stevens. All inside my tired little melon.


1 comment:

Karyn said...

I HEART Cat Stevens' music. And while, like you, I respect the rights of others to worship as they see fit, extremism scares me. It should scare more people; it's not about bigotry or fearing the differences in our belief systems, it's often that per the view of the extremists, anyone who doesn't subscribe and adhere to their principles is fair game.

Anyway, Cat Stevens, yeah. I'm all over that.